Warning! Headline Autopsy

I know plenty of people who have ezine lists of 2,000 to 3,000 names and still their sales results are dismal.

After further investigation, they discover open mail rates of 40-60% or unsubcribe rates of 10% after three ezine issues. What's up with that?

Just because the "gurus" scream the money is in the list, you came up with this wild idea about sending out an ezine every 2 weeks or 4 weeks, now you have a problem... don't you? You just can't deliver.

Just not feeling resourceful today?

Look... there are days when I'm lucky to string together two coherent sentences. What do you do?

Well here's one solution!

Cancel your ezine... hang it up mentally. It's time to re-wire your brain. It's time to start writing for fun... So put up your stuffy shirts and don't get your panties in a bunch. Quit boring your readers with a bunch of facts. Write like you talk. So listen up.

The money is not in the list. The money is in what you do with your list.

Don't get mad at me... your messenger and please put that gun away.

If we write to entertain, educate, or inform... then how do we get people to read our stuff?

It's in the headline silly!

Let's explore some headlines to pull your reader in... but don't forget we have to deliver when he or she arrives. I've had many instances where I worked my behind off getting people in and then we kind of sit there and stare at each other in the ezine parlor. There's an uncomfortable silence in the room and I'm the one that created it. So keep in the back of your mind that the headline is part one of the two part formula. Part two is to deliver.

Do you know the value of a good headline?

Newspaper people do. Movie Producers do. Copywriters do. I do. (I now pronounce you a smart writer).

We could write the best ezines, blogs, and site content on the face of the earth. It can entertain and inform the heck out of people. But no one will read this stuff unless we do our job with the headline. Don't you agree? Say Yes.

Look at that word headline. Head (in front of or first or #1 honcho or the big cheese) and Line (as in you don't get much room to pontificate with pithy stuff).

So here's my challenge.

If words can create or destroy, build up or tear down, inspire or discourage, heal or hurt... then I have a powerful responsibility when I choose to write. Don't I?

Take a look at these headline examples and you tell me which would make you yawn and which would entice you to beg me for more. I'll trust your judgment.

Ten steps to Financial Freedom (yawn) or "How to get out of debt in 1 year or less... and have fun doing it". How To Loose Weight with my diet pills (yawn) or "Breaking News! Diets don't Work... This does!" New Rubber Formulated Tires That Last Longer (wake me up when it's over) or "You're Kidding! Tires That Never Go Flat?" Our Burglar Alarm System is the best and cheapest (oh Lord... you can do better than that) or "Remember When You Could Leave Your Doors Unlocked?"

Now if I just sit here and lecture you... that's no fun. First of all it's rude. Second, I'm no guru. I need your input.

So for those of you not afraid to step out on a limb (where the fruit is), please list a boring headline on your site. I want you to pick the worst grabber you can find. It can be on a sales page, a header, or even your ezine sign up page... just list one and let's see if the rest of us can be a little more resourceful with your stuff, cents (I know) we refuse to be resourceful with our stuff because we never screw up.

Just keep a couple of guidelines to keep in mind.

First, words can hurt so be constructive, please. And B, please don't upchuck at the autopsy. It's not a pretty site (I know... another mis-spelling).

Until Next Time...

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Thanks for your calling it to my attention that I can be a little more creative.

I don't know if this headline is ...